There comes a time in most parent-child relationships when the roles reverse. After a lifetime of being cared for, many adult children must face the difficult and often confusing prospect of caring for their aging parents. Illness, social isolation, and other issues facing the elderly can require intensive attention, and because adult children tend to have busy lives, many make the decision to move their aging parents to improve access and quality of care.

Moving is never easy, and moving a parent can be particularly tough for all parties involved. If you are embarking on the emotional journey of relocating an aging parent, you might benefit from the following tips for making the process easier and more enjoyable for everyone.

Communicate Clearly About Emotions

Moving tends to inspire all sorts of emotions, and those emotions can be particularly powerful amongst seniors, who may have decades of memories in their current homes. It is not uncommon for moving to elicit feelings of sadness, grief, and loss, especially considering that your parent is likely downsizing during the move. Your parent might experience anger if they are reluctant to relocate, and they will almost certainly feel fear while facing a new and unfamiliar chapter in their life.

Compounding the issue is the possibility that your parent is already experiencing challenges to their mental health. According to a National Health Survey, 17.3-22.4% of Australian adults aged 65 and older suffer from a long-term mental or behavioural health condition, such as chronic anxiety or depression.

There are also steps that you can take to help alleviate some of this grief or discomfort, depending on where your parent is relocating to. For example, if they are moving to a walkable neighbourhood, these areas tend to be better for one’s mental health because additional opportunities to get outside and recreate can help alleviate stress. Walkable neighbourhoods may also be a good option for aging adults because of reduced traffic and additional opportunities to socialize.

Your parent isn’t the only one likely to experience intense emotions during this period of upheaval. In moving your parent out of their home, you are assuming some degree of responsibility for their care, and that role reversal can cause stress and dismay. You might also experience guilt — if your parent is resisting the move — or similar feelings of loss and grief if the move requires you to sell your childhood home. You need to recognize how your own emotional state could impact the move for both you and your parent.

As you are making decisions regarding your parent’s move, you should have plenty of open and honest talks with your parent regarding your respective emotions. Sharing your emotions with your parent might feel uncomfortable at first, but with practise, you should cultivate a deeper understanding and respect for one another, which can lead to an easier and more successful move.

Plan the Move With Practicality

Many of the emotions associated with moving an aging parent can be mitigated through proper planning. Stress, fear, grief, and other negative feelings related to the move might lessen or even disappear entirely if you take the following actions to make your parent’s move as easy as possible:

• Use a moving company. A company familiar with the challenges associated with moving the elderly can provide valuable assistance in packing, shipping, and setting up your parent’s space, allowing you to devote more energy toward your parent or your other responsibilities.
• Set up services before the move. Especially if your parent is moving into a space outside your home, like an apartment or assisted living space, you should make sure your parent’s utilities will be turned on before moving day.
• Clean and organise the new space. No one looks forward to moving into a dirty, disorganised space. You can hire a cleaning company, or you can work with your parent to get their new home clean and set up to their specifications.
• Ensure continued communication. Loneliness is one of the greatest threats to your aging parent’s health, so you should give them the tools to maintain communication with friends and family after their move. They should have access to a strong, reliable internet connection in their new home, so they can reach loved ones quickly and easily.
• Add extra security. You might be able to improve your peace of mind by installing a security system in your parent’s new place. Smart cameras, motion-activated lights, and emergency response options are likely to make everyone rest easier after the move.

Moving an aging parent isn’t an easy decision, but it is often the right one. Fortunately, you can take steps to alleviate some heightened emotions, so everyone finds safety, solace, and success.